A different man in 1980 Jan. 7, 1986

 

1980 began at Dodd’s Orange – a rock club managed by Pauly’s ex-music partner from the Stolen Rolls.

This was a New Year’s event I will never forget and painted a very uncomfortable portrait of my life at the time.

It was a moment when the curtain got pulled back, not just on my life, but on everybody’s life around me, a veil of illusion that had kept me from seeing who I was and who they were.

And it scared the crap out of me.

I had just started coming out of an emotional shell my breakup with my ex-wife years earlier had left me in.

From September 1979 onward, I lived a double life, maybe even a triple life, living on one level an almost perfect student’s life, being part of a group of people I could envision myself graduating with (of course, it didn’t happen, but that’s another story). I hung out with people from The Morgue (one of the dorm rooms) and talked with people who loved writing as much as I did, leading me to believe I might actually live my life as a writer someday.

My second life was rock and roll, working by night like a vampire as a roadie and soundman, taking full advantage of the sexual opportunities granted me. I recall one young girl from Rutherford who I had picked up in a Mountainside bar, who later claimed I had gotten her pregnant – which turned out to be a lie. I briefly dated a barmaid from that same bar, and at Hank’s insistence, dated a girl named Kathy, who Hank loved, but who loved my look alike character, who brutalized women, and Hank wanted me to save her from. I had a brief fling with a groupie named Joy, which relieved the members of the band who had wondered why I resisted groupies before that.

My third life was my real life, a man living in a cold water flat in Passaic, lost in a sequence of temporary arrangements with the vain hope I might find someone to share life with more permanently.

By May, the band life had ended; school had burned me out, leaving the ruined wreck of that third person – that point when miraculously, Suzanne came into my life, and faded just as quickly. By mid-summer our love affair was already shaky although I didn’t know the worst of it until much later.

I spent the summer working at Two Guys in Garfield, while Suzanne had taken a job in a cable tv company (the beginning of a whole new reality neither of us realized at the time). My world was very working class, full of working-class people struggling to survive, with me thrown into the mix, where I came to face with the folly of my radical beliefs when it came down to the bread-and-butter people I labored beside. I had this illusion about how capitalism and foolish notions fed into my head by radical professors, none of whom ever worked a real job in their lives or understand the struggle real people went through every day.

I resisted the bosses at Two Guys, and then saw working people following me as if I was a leader. I had nothing to lose; they had everything to lose. This, I learned, was the way of the radical, always spouting out crap that other people suffered for.

Suzanne and I had some good times that summer, but it was a strained and strange relationship that got even stranger in September when I quit my job to go back to school, and she got a job at a prominent insurance company in Newark – she taking a very long step into middle class, and we had less in common.

She grew more distant and colder, and by far less sympathetic, something that became clearer in September when I got hit with a series of disasters, my car breaking down, my license revoked (for failure to pay a ticket, and my phone got shut off.

Eventually, I worked my way out of that insanity. So, by Christmas, things seemed pleasant again with Suzanne as well as my finances.

For the holiday season, I took a seasonal job at Toys R Us where Garrick’s cousin also worked – someone I had always been attracted to, even when she was still married.

In September, I became editor of the school literary magazine and would continue this for the next two semesters.

But I had become a different man at the end of 1980 than I was at its beginning and could never go back again.

I mentioned the Dodd’s event because the band played New Year’s in, and afterwards, we wrecked the place: band members, roadies, bartenders, groupies, and others, in an insane emotion filled moment that left the place in shambles – yet not bad enough for us to be banned from playing there later. It was a strange way to start a new decade.

 1986 Menu


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